Monday, March 4, 2013

Our Journey Part 5

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

The call said that I wasn't pregnant.

I was numb. The nurse on the phone was so sorry and so sad.

My mom was really worried about me.

I told her I was okay...disappointed, but okay. I promised her I was fine.

I really thought I was.

Then Jace got home from work, we talked for a few short minutes...and then I lost it.

I mean, huge sobs that shook the house, and where you get hiccups halfway through crying that don't go away, and make you almost inaudible as you talk (or try to).

Jace was flabbergasted. He told me, "I told you that you weren't pregnant...(which set me off, i tell you what) we don't even have our tests back yet!"

I KNEW the chances to get pregnant on the first go, without our test results back, were slim.
I knew that I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up...and I really tried not to. Seriously.

But, I should've known that of COURSE I was going to get my hopes up!
I want this THAT bad.

But. ((deep breath))

Life goes on, and another month, means another chance. (unfortunately more medications AND extra in this case as well.)


  1. :-( I'm sorry I was so hoping you were holding the new because it was a positive. Sending good vibes your way!

  2. I'm so sorry, I can't even imagine how hard this is for you. I want you to know I appreciate you sharing your feelings with us. It helps me better understand other people that I know who are in your same position. I feel very strongly that you two will have a baby. Keep being positive; it will happen. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this uncertainty and disappointment. Tell Jace that I'm praying for you guys, he's a great friend!

  3. I'm sorry, dear friend. I just read a pin you liked on pinterest that said "I smile to hide how completely overwhelmed I am" and I know it must be true, but I'm so amazed at your continued positivity. I can't imagine how hard this is for you, but I think you are amazing and strong. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers...I love you!


If you are new to this blog (or not!), comment and don't be shy! I would love to hear from you!! Also...please don't say anything mean. There is no need for me to want to high five the face...with chairs. mmmmk??