Saturday, August 1, 2015

Cue Honesty

There are lots of things that I dont say.

There are lots of things that I dont show.

I hide them from others.

For fear of them making light of my hardships.

For fear of them making fun of me for my hopes and dreams.

For fear of no support.


Cue Honesty.

My husband has had an addiction that I knew nothing about. It devastated me. Its been hard.

I want another baby so badly, but have no idea when or even IF it will happen.

I love my son so much it hurts. It also hurts when he seems to want everyone else BUT me.

I have a beautiful home. I'm a good cleaner. However 97% of the time it looks like a bomb went off.

I have NO idea how to stay on top of all the yard work we need to do.

There are dirty dishes ALWAYS in my sink.

My son throws his food. EVERY SINGLE MEAL.

Im lucky to take 2 showers a week. A WEEK.

Makeup has only been on my face 6 times in the last MONTH.

Nash keeps getting sick and it worries me. He also wont nap which cant be good for him.

I started my own business and i've had clients all week. Its been awesome! But i'm scared it wont last.

I worry that I'm not enough. That I dont do enough. That I dont matter enough.

But i'm working on all of it.

Today for example. I washed all of my dirty dishes. I put a load of laundry through. I showered with Nash, got us both dressed, did my hair and makeup and cut 2 kids hair this afternoon. I picked up the family room and dining room while Nash "napped"and I'm currently editing a picture for someone.

Life is hard. Its scary. Its alot to handle sometimes. But I'm working on it. :)

1 comment:

  1. Yes, life is hard. And it doesn't get any easier. Thankfully, the things that are hard right now will (mostly) change and get better, and you'll be dealing with different hard things. But hopefully this is one of the most challenging times of your life. You're dealing with a lot - it's totally possible! (And you can get through it!)


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