When you are having a hard time (in general), its hard to keep things in perspective.
I have had a few friends reach out (who i havent seen in almost TEN YEARS) and make sure i'm okay. I sure love them. It just makes me happy knowing that even though I dont feel like I have alot of friends, the friends that I do have are quality. Katy, Emily, and Whitni--I'm talking about you. You girls are so sweet and I love you so much.
I'm going through spurts of doing okay, and then not so okay.
Nash is sick again and I'm up with him all night holding him so he can get some sleep. It isnt working out so well for either of us.
I'm having my second period in 16 months and its knocked me flat out.
I'm working alot right now, which is wonderful, but also hard trying to juggle a baby's schedule too.
The other night, Jace and I got into a really beyond stupid fight. I went in and wrote in my journal something I have never even said out loud. The stupid quote "Life sucks and then you die". I have never felt like that, and I'm angry that I let myself feel like that and that I wrote it down.
Today I am feeling pretty crappy. Nash is still really sick (we have a doctors appointment later). But I made appointments that I needed to and fed my son, and made my bed. So...thats something, right?
I also read 2 articles that made me believe in humanity again...
and then I watched this video and I've just been sitting here in tears, thanking my Heavenly Father for some perspective.
Anyone out there having a hard time right now...I want you to know you are NOT alone.
And I love you.
8 months ago